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Jesus said, “I will build My Church…” There is a single organization that teaches the entire truth of the Bible, and is called to live by “every word of God.” Do you know how to find it? Christ said it would:
Picture this scenario: you are talking with a friend about getting together sometime with a group to do a fun activity. Various ideas are thrown around such as going to the movies, playing soccer, going for a hike, playing games and visiting a museum. After some discussion, your friend asks, “Would you like to come to my house for games this Sunday at 2:00 p.m.?”
How wonderful it is to be invited to someone’s home—for a meal, movie, games or any gathering! One question that may come to mind is, how can I be a good guest?
First, start with accepting the invitation. RSVP (from the French phrase “Répondez s’il vous plaît” meaning “please respond”) as soon as you know whether you will be able to attend. If you commit to attending, be sure to let your host know if plans change and you become unable to attend. If you will be late, it is helpful to communicate your expected arrival time. If you must turn down an invitation, be polite and express your gratitude for the host’s thoughtfulness.
When you accept the invitation, ask your host if there is anything you can bring—maybe a favorite game, snack or an item for the meal. If so, ask for relevant details such as how many people will be in attendance, if anyone has food allergies, and if you should arrive early with your item. If there is not anything your host asks you to bring for the gathering, consider a thank you card for your host or a small gift such as a box of chocolates.
Next, decide on the appropriate attire for the occasion. This may have been communicated in the invitation. If not, think about the event. Is it a casual indoor gathering such as playing board games? Or an evening dinner where dressier attire would be better? Or games outdoors on a sunny day where shorts would be appropriate? When in doubt, ask the host for clarification.
You can also ask about carpooling or where to park if it is not included in the invitation. It is ideal to arrive on time or five minutes late (this allows the host a little more time for last-minute preparation).
After thoughtful preparation, you arrive at your friend’s home for games on Sunday afternoon, excited to be together with everyone. It’s always considerate to offer to help your host after you arrive. Maybe there is something you can help set up. Perhaps you can help take coats or offer drinks as other guests arrive. If the host does not have anything for you to help with at that time, feel free to engage in conversation with other guests as they arrive. In this way, you are actually helping by helping others have a good time!
Put yourself in the host’s shoes—and if you have hosted before, think about what that was like. It is not always easy to host, so make the afternoon as easy and fun for the host as possible. Do your best to help keep them included in the conversation and activities, so they do not have to focus on serving for the entire event.
You have had lots of fun, but at some point, all good things come to an end. Be aware of the time and do not stay too late. If your host starts making comments about how late it is getting, that is a good hint to suggest wrapping things up! You can also take a cue from other guests. As things start to wrap up, this is an opportunity to ask your host if there is anything you can do to help clean up. If even just a few people gather empty cups, put game pieces back into their boxes, or take empty dishes into the kitchen, it can save the host a lot of time. Just be sure not to overstay your welcome! Unless you are actually helping out, try not to be the last one to leave while your host is trying to avoid falling asleep.
Be sure to thank your host for having you over. Let them know how much you appreciate the time you spent together.
If you apply the points above, you may be invited out more often. Go out and have a good time being a good guest!
Developing your ability to converse with others will greatly help you to be a good guest. Conversations are an essential part of helping everyone have a great time and build friendships. It is also an art—an arena for expressing emotions, experiences and viewpoints. When done right, the world around you slips away, and you focus solely on the other person or group. Here are several important conversation points to apply.
Remember to smile: A smile is a wonderful way to greet someone and show that you are excited to see them. It also helps brighten the overall mood of a group.
Take the initiative: Approaching someone new and introducing yourself may sound frightening at first, but doing so will help break the ice. If everyone at a gathering just stands around, no one will get to know each other. Be the one to start the conversation flowing!
Be an active listener: As others speak, listen carefully. Let the words sink in, and think of ways to contribute to the conversation. Then share your comments and ask follow-up questions to explore a topic. Maybe you have had a similar experience to what is being discussed. However, be careful not to always turn the conversation back to yourself—this can give the impression that you are not really interested in others.
Plan ahead: Think about stimulating topics of conversation ahead of time. You can ask others how they have been since the last time you saw them and if there is anything new in their lives. Think about news topics or an interesting article you could share. A simple question that everyone could answer is excellent for breaking the ice. This could include: “What is your favorite color and why?” “What country would you like to visit and why?” “What is a sport you enjoy playing or watching?”
Avoid monopolizing the conversation: Talk for a while but then pause to let others jump in. Or you can ask a question of someone who has been quiet to help involve them in the conversation. If your host has just joined the group, bring them up to speed with the current topic so they can participate too.
Be aware of your body language: Non-verbal communication helps show others you are interested in what they are saying. Provide eye contact—do not stare at your phone while others are talking! Look into the eyes of the person you are speaking with most of the time but do not stare at them. Allow natural facial expressions to show—such as agreement (nodding your head), surprise (eyes wide), or confusion (eyebrows furrowed). Have an open posture with relaxed arms, not looking down or fidgeting. Hug or high-five those you are close with, but avoid being too touchy if you are unfamiliar with a person. When in doubt, a simple handshake works well.
Words matter: Words are powerful, and it’s always good to carefully consider what you say before you say it. That way, you can avoid unintentionally embarrassing someone with a story they may not want to be shared. Additionally, it is a wonderful skill to be able to use words to make a joke, as laughter always adds positively to a group setting.
You will grow and improve as a conversationalist as you practice these skills. Each time you make the effort to have a good conversation and show genuine interest, you are practicing God’s way of giving to others!
