article from AUGUST 2006 ISSUE
Now That You Are Twenty...
When you leave your teenage years, what does it mean in regard to the Church?
BY KEVIN D. DENEE
The teen years of one’s life are exciting in many ways. It is the period of transition from boy to man or girl to woman. It is a time to obtain education and develop your personality. It is the stage in life when a young person begins to think of a host of future life-defining decisions and events.
Eventually, every teen turns 20 years old—but what does this mean? Are there principles or guidelines to apply in approaching this stage in life?
You might ask, “Can I stay in the Church indefinitely without pursuing baptism?” “Are there any goals I should have?” “Exactly what should I be looking for in committing to the Church?”
This article will answer these questions and many more. It will become required reading for all who turn 20 and are not baptized.
However, this article’s purpose is not to say that as soon as you turn 20 a countdown clock automatically begins to when you must commit to God’s way of life. Rather, it is intended to put every 18-, 19- or 20-year-old “on the same page.” It is to help everyone understand what it means to be approaching and reaching the age of 20 and to explain where such an individual should be heading—and why.
A Lethargic Society
First, youth must understand the environment in which they have grown up. Today’s society conditions teenagers to just “go with the flow,” to “be cool” and “relax.” Many teens deal with the future with the following mentality: “What’s the worry, man?” Teens are becoming lazier. Too much time playing video games, among other things, has caused teenagers to become almost allergic to work—to setting goals—to diligently planning one’s life.
Many in the world simply bump into huge decisions by accident rather than planning for them ahead of time. Many get married because they feel they have found love, but never properly date or court the person to know for sure. Many are unsure of what they want to do with their careers; they do not use all the education options available to them. Many start or continue a job just because it was easily available.
Every teenager in God’s Church must fight against this current.
One of the largest elements that causes young people not to succeed in life, or not to succeed in God’s way of life, is lack of maturity.
You may not like to read this next statement, but it is true nonetheless: As a teenager, you are very immature—whether you know it or not. Even if you are considered a mature teenager, you simply do not yet have the life experience, knowledge, decision-making skills and understanding that shape a successful, mature adult. Often, a person is less mature than his or her age. Be determined to work on maturity—to grow up.
Although building maturity is a process that continues throughout your lifetime, at 20 you become an adult and must start thinking like one—in every area of your life! (Take time to study our article “Are You Emotionally Mature?”)
Set Goals
In your late teens or early twenties, you should start thinking about what you want to accomplish in life.
At some point, you may want to get married and begin a family. Are you preparing for that? Are you developing your personality? Are you saving money?
This is the time to finalize your education and settle on a career. Are you considering what type of education is best and for which career you are best suited? Are you matching the practicality of your childhood dream of becoming a ballerina or an astronaut with the reality of needing to support yourself or a family in the future?
Other questions may arise: Where do you want to live? Are you planning to move out of your parents’ home? What about a job while you finish your schooling?
These and many other questions should be asked by older teenagers who want to be diligent—and successful in life.
Yet there is another aspect of life that vastly outweighs all others…
Eternal Life
If (of course, a rhetorical “if”) God exists and the Bible is His Word, then committing to obeying all of His laws is the most important decision anyone could ever make. God promises eternal life to those who obey Him. What could be a bigger goal? Marriage, children, a house, a career—or anything else—cannot be compared to eternal life in God’s kingdom.
Of course, any wise person would still take time to carefully plan and focus on all the physical things just mentioned. If they are planned correctly, one can have a very successful physical life. However, you cannot afford to become “too busy” with physical goals. Many do this, and never “get around” to working toward baptism.
Again, what is more important: a career lasting a few decades—or a life lasting for eternity?
What is the Church?
To understand why a young person should, at some point, focus on working toward baptism, we need to take a step back and ask: What is the Church? Is it a building? Is it a corporation?
It is neither—rather, it is a group of people! The word “church” in the Greek language is ekklesia, which means “called-out ones.” Consider what this means. When someone is in God’s Church, he has been called out of the world!
But, what does coming out of the world mean? Notice: “Wherefore come out from among them, and be you separate, says the Lord” (II Cor. 6:17). When you come out of the world, you are to be separate and different from it. God’s people—those who are part of the “called-out ones”—are citizens of another country: “But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that you should show forth the praises of Him who has called you out of darkness into His marvelous light” (I Pet. 2:9).
When a teenager becomes an adult, he must take steps toward becoming part of the “called-out ones”—he cannot keep one foot in the world and one in the Church.
A Trend
In all congregations in the late 1980s and early 90s, certain guidelines and standards became lax. Many in their early twenties did not recognize that the Church consisted of the “called-out ones,” and that they were either to make a decision to pursue baptism or go into the world.
This type of environment continued in the late 1990s and exists today in the splinter groups. Some groups have even created a new demographic of people in their early twenties who have not committed to God’s way of life. This is not the case with God’s true Church.
In ancient Israel, once a person reached 20, he was considered an adult. The same is true today in spiritual Israel, the Church. And, being an adult means one must make adult decisions.
Occasionally (and this is rare) teenagers come into The Restored Church of God with their parents and spend several years listening to sermons and reading literature. Before long, they turn 20, and a few more years pass by; but they never make a decision. Eventually, not making a decision is a decision! Inaction is a form of action!
Again, you cannot have one foot in the world and one in the Church—it simply does not work. Turning 25, continuing to attend services, but not making a decision, is simply a halfhearted approach. It is saying, “I’m kinda interested in Church, and I’m kinda not.”
This is a trend that will continue in the splinters—but not in God’s Church.
Double Standards
The Church cannot have two standards. Stop and consider. People contact the Church wanting to attend services. We explain to these individuals that they need a basic understanding of the truth, and we point them to literature. Once they have studied basic literature and still want to attend, we have a brief but important discussion with them.
In this counseling session, we explain exactly what it means to attend services. Once a person begins attending, he is considered a prospective member, and on the way to full membership. To be a member of God’s Church, one must be baptized and receive the Holy Spirit. First, one must settle into attending for at least three months, and then he can begin counseling if he is ready. After about 6 months (and usually no more than 12), the individual should begin counseling for baptism.
Being a prospective member and attending services means the individual is on track toward baptism. Prospective members cannot attend services indefinitely without making a decision to become a full member. (Of course, there can be the rare circumstance when there is a longer wait for baptism.)
Consider this example: If a 21-year-old contacted us from the world, we would go through the above-mentioned counseling session once he has read basic material. When the person begins attending, he would understand that he is tracking toward baptism.
On the other hand, this prospective member would likely come in contact with people of similar age who have grown up in the Church or who have been in the Church for several years, attending with parents. This group of young people needs to understand that they are also on track toward baptism. Otherwise, this would be a double standard. The new person could think, “Wait a minute, I just counseled with a minister who said that when I attend, I am on track toward baptism. Yet there are people here my age who know much more about God’s way of life than I do, but aren’t doing a thing!”
This would be a double standard, and the Church cannot have this! The Church cannot allow some young people to continue “partly” in the world and “partly” in the Church while new people are coming into the Church and working at coming completely out of the world.
While there is not always a formal talk with a minister, every teen in God’s Church should understand that, when he turns 20, he has become a prospective member and should be heading toward baptism. In years past, we have had some who spent far too long never making a decision. They were bad examples to those coming into the Church. Teenagers who turn 20 and have been in the Church should be setting the example to new people, not the other way around.
This does not mean that as soon as you turn 20 you have a six-month timeline. Each person’s calling and conversion process is a little different, just as each person is different. However, upon approaching and reaching 20, you should start focusing on this area. Again, the Church is made up of the “called-out ones,” and our young people cannot continue with one foot in the world and one in the Church.
When Should I Begin?
A common question young people ask is, “When should I begin?” This raises several points to consider.
There is not a perfect age. Different circumstances dictate the best time to work toward baptism. As early as age 18, a person can begin in that direction; however, around the age of 20 is more common. This is one of the things you should feel free and comfortable talking about with your local minister or Headquarters.
Be very careful if you have grown up in the Church or have attended for several years with your parents. Do not wait for the figurative “handwriting on the wall” or angels singing from heaven as a sign that you should begin working toward baptism. Many are waiting for the “catching fire” that new members often talk about; but this is a misconception. You must start the process by studying and praying that God shows you where you should be. Having attended for several years or perhaps even from birth, God’s truth and way of life is something you are already familiar with, having been learning it for years.
Children of members are sanctified (I Cor. 7:14)—which means they are “set apart.” They are neither cut off like the rest of the world, nor are they automatically called. They are free to seek God and, therefore, should “seek…the Lord while He may be found” (Isa. 55:6).
Also, they are learning the truth in a way that is different from those discovering the Church for the first time, when everything is brand new. Because of this, there will not be the same reaction. God’s truth will not hit you like “a ton of bricks,” because you already know many of His doctrines and commandments. Most who come from the world are continually surprised and excited by all the new truths being revealed to them. There is a zeal and “first love” from the sheer excitement that does not occur in the same way with one who has heard these truths taught for years, sometimes decades.
Here is the point: Do not wait for the “handwriting on the wall,” a “sign” from the heavens or the instantaneous zeal you think will eventually come! You must make an effort to study God’s truths deeply, to prove this way of life. Ask God—on your knees—to help you work toward baptism. He will answer your prayer.
Similarly, do not wait until you are “good enough” for baptism. You cannot overcome spiritual problems without God’s Holy Spirit. To wait until you are good enough is an indefinite and futile wait, as you will never be good enough without God’s help.
Finally, realize you are held accountable for what you know, even if you are not baptized. Do not take this lightly. Notice Ecclesiastes 11:9: “Rejoice, O young man, in your youth; and let your heart cheer you in the days of your youth, and walk in the ways of your heart, and in the sight of your eyes: but know you, that for all these things God will bring you into judgment.” (Also see 12:1.)
Where to Start
Although you may ask the ministry or Headquarters questions, there are several things you can do before coming to a minister to officially counsel for baptism. If you have not done so already, you should thoroughly study the Bible Introduction Course. Read each lesson and the referenced literature. Study and write out all the scriptures that answer the questions. This will prove to be a very strong foundation for the rest of your life.
Also, you need to prove—beyond a shadow of a doubt—that God exists, that the Bible is His Word and that The Restored Church of God is God’s one true Church. The Church provides literature that aids in these three areas.
When you feel you are ready to begin counseling, talk to your local minister or contact Headquarters.
Again, this article does not institute a policy that sets the exact amount of time you have to make a decision to become baptized. However, it does make the point that when you turn 20, you should be actively pursuing goals, events and decisions ahead of you. The most important is committing to God’s way of life.
If you recently turned 20, and are not yet baptized, take time to prove this way—and live it for the rest of your life!